When Mytre ran away from me, I was sure my heart would break. When I mentioned the Vision Quest I had spoken from within, without hesitation. And now, I have lost him. How could I have used such harsh words? I spent the rest of day inside the cave feeling worse than I could ever remember. How could I go from such wonderful heights of ecstasy and then plummet into deep despair. Had I lost all touch with my inner peace just because I had lost a man? However, he was not just any man. He was my Divine Complement, my Twin Flame. That is what the inner voice said, and my heart agreed.
I tortured myself through the entire day and into sunset, when I suddenly had a feeling of deep urgency and pending disaster. Something was about to happen or had just happened to Mytre. I calmed my mind and went inside to speak to the Mother. All I heard was “Send him healing love.” Then, I became terrified for that clearly meant that he was injured. But, where was he injured, and how? It was too late to follow his tracks, and I would only get lost myself. All I could do was spend most of the night worrying.
Then, I heard the Mother saying, “Drink some calming tea and sleep. You must be alert for tomorrow.” I did what she said and finally fell into a fitful sleep. I do not remember any dreams, nor did I get much rest. However, I woke up knowing that he had been injured, and I knew that I must find him. At sunrise, I packed all my healing herbs, poultices, more clothes, food and water. My pack was heavy, and I would not able to run. Therefore, I had to bring some kindling and my fire stones. He had walked off in the direction where the forest ended, and there could be nothing to burn.
As soon as it was light enough I started my journey. My pack was heavy and I had to go slowly to read his tracks. Some times there seemed to be no tracks, and I had to stop to consult the Mother. I walked all day, and almost till dark. I had never been to this area, so I had to stop and set up camp. There would be no use in both of us becoming injured. After I had eaten a small meal, I tried to go within, buy my growing fear for his safety did not allow me any information or much sleep.
It was mid-day, and I had to find a way to get off this ledge. Another night in the cold without food or water would be far too dangerous for my leg. I had not noticed the large gash in my leg, which was now infected, and I knew I had a fever. If I didn’t move, I would pass out again. I had to trust the Inner Voice. I could not abandon Mytria in this way, I could not abandon my duty, and I could not abandon my self.
As I looked around, I could see no means of escape. Therefore, I looked inside to ask the Inner Voice. Perhaps I was hallucinating, but as soon as I closed my eyes, I saw the image of my SELF in my Vision Quest. “Follow me and listen to the Mother,” he said as he moved along the ledge to my right. I would have to crawl and drag my right leg, as I could not damage it more by putting weight on it.
After what seemed like forever, I found a space between the edge of the ledge and a bolder that I could—very carefully—crawl along. Once I went around the bolder, I found a gentler incline toward the top. The ground here was more stable, and there was even some foliage to grab onto. The Inner Voice reminded me to listen to the Mother again, and so I did. I touched the earth in the manner which Mytria had taught me and asked for Her guidance.
Instantly, I had a feeling to follow a certain trough in the earth, which afforded be enough security to frequently rest. I fought off my dizziness from my fever and lack of water, and contacted the Mother with my every choice of movement. My progress was very slow, but I was gradually moving up the side of the cliff. However, it was getting dark. I had to get to the top while there was enough light to see what I was doing.
I realized that I was going slowly for the sake of my leg, but I had to move more quickly to reach the top before dark. I closed my eyes for a moment to remember my vision. This version of me could move without even touching the ground. If I could BE that me, I could trust my every movement without hesitation. It took a while to envision my self in that manner, but I gradually began to feel a light about my form. I slowly opened my eyes to see that my body and the cliff around me were glowing.
I pushed aside my doubts of “hallucination” and chose to believe my experience. Now, I knew exactly where to place my hands and my good leg. There was no hesitation, no fear, no adrenalin, and no pain. I was in some sort of trance that allowed me to become ONE with the cliff. It almost felt as if the cliff was assisting my movement. When I looked up and saw an overhanging ledge, I did not fear.
Instead, I easily found an alternate route that allowed me to easily crawl over the top and onto flat ground. I rolled away from the cliff and I pulled myself over to a huge rock that held the heat of the day. I pushed myself against the warm rock and patted it to thank the Mother. Then, I looked up into the starry sky under which Mytria and I had fallen asleep many times and saw my body of light embracing hers. With this image in my mind, I fell into a deep sleep.
MYTRIA AND MYTRE SPEAK:
We realized later that we were very close to each other, but did not know it. However, this physical distance was necessary for us to bridge the etheric gap that still existed between us. We both looked into the starry sky and thanked the Mother for assisting us. Even though our bodies were apart, our hearts and minds were joined as we fell asleep. In fact, we had the same dream, or was it a vision.
We found ourselves back in the Core of the Mother, at the exact moment of our “accidental” merging. Now, after all we had been through, being merged into one person felt even stronger. We were both different people now. We had both survived and successfully completed our Initiations and had conquered our inner demons, which made our love even stronger.
As we stood as one, looking into each other’s eyes, the Mother came to us. We thought it was to bless us, but it was actually to give us our next assignment.
“My beloved children,” She said to us both, “You may think your long journey has ended, but it has actually just begun. I need you both to help me, as you have both become my allies of transmutation. You have transformed yourselves, and now I must ask you to assist me to transmute my Planet.”
We were both deeply honored, but somehow worried. Was there something in Her voice that made us concerned that we could not stay together? NO, we would not allow that to happen. After all we had been through, we would never part again—NEVER!
We both awoke to the hint of dawn. There was not enough light for Mytria to read the tracks, but we were joined into one being again. Therefore, she simply followed the call of my love. It was mid day when we rejoined again.
When I awoke from my dream/vision, I knew Mytria was near. I touched the land to call her through the earth and sent my love out to her direction. In fact, I could see in my mind exactly where she was, just as she told me later that she could see me in the same way. I pulled my self up the hill a bit so that I could more easily she her approach. I found a strong stick and some how got myself to my feet. I would not greet her lying on the ground like a wounded animal.
It was then that I saw her walking towards me. When she saw me, she laid down her heavy pack and ran to me as fast as she could. When we met our hearts burst with the love that we thought we had lost, only to regain—stronger than ever. We held each other so tight that we seemed to be one body, as Mytria sobbed onto my chest. I tried not to cry, but my joy could only be expressed in the manner.
We stood there for a long time. All my pain was temporarily gone within the merging of our bodies. In fact, I felt a great healing force coming from her and into my body. As she held me and wept, I felt my fever diminish and my leg begin to heal. Then, I realized that she was draining herself too much in her effort to heal me. I lovingly pushed her away, keeping my hands on her shoulders.
“Thank you Beloved, I can heal myself the rest of the way. If you could just assist me to that shady tree…”
“Yes,” she spoke as she looked into my eyes.
Between her support and the stick I had found, I was able to hobble over to the tree and sit down on the earth between two large roots. Mytria kissed me on the forehead and ran up to get her pack.
“I will have to set this leg before I dress it,” she said apologetically.
“I am ready,” I replied.
Before I knew it, the leg was set, my wound was cleaned, wrapped in herbs, which where covered with a tree bark, and the sticks I had found were replaced and held in place by a clean sash.
“When we get back to OUR camp, I can make you a proper cast,” she said as she gently patted my leg.
We decided to stay there for the remainder of the day and take off to OUR home at sunrise the next day. It was an excellent decision, for that night under the stars was beyond words. Some how we managed to make love. In fact, we made love again and again, each time going deeper and deeper into each other’s very Soul, in fact, into our joint Soul.
Mytria had heard of Divine Complements during her Temple studies, and told me all she knew. And then, we had to make love again, which is when it happened. Mytria tried to keep it from me, but I knew we made a child then. How could we not? The heavens almost opened and sent her down. Yes, it would be a daughter, our daughter, our love-child.
Through Suzanne Lie, PhD